Joe Gregorio
Having kids means you hear sentences around the house that you would never hear uttered otherwise.
On safety
From the four year old:
Why is there blood and bandages all over the bathroom?
Answer: The 13 year old just got a real Swiss Army knife for his birthday. With real Swiss blades. Which can really cut not-so-Swiss hands. Which he tried to bandage up himself to avoid the embarassment. Apparently the embarassment wasn't deep enough to compel him to try to hide the incident by actually cleaning up after himself.
On nature
Yelled out the back door:
Put your clothes back on on the trampoline.
On siblings
How many times have I told you, don't lick your brother.
On the subject of eating bugs
Talking with the 11 year old about his day:
So there was this bug...
Did you eat it?
That was one ant, two years ago, sheeesh!